Friday 3 October 2008
Grow up, would you?
Maybe it takes some of us who had a poor start our whole lives to grow up. It's been borne upon me in the past few weeks of stress and overwork that, although I don't find this any less wretched and exhausting than I ever did, my resources and resilience are a lot greater these days - maybe I'm finally becoming, not a happy or successful grown-up, more of a sad, fat, silly one, I'm afraid, but a grown-up all the same, a person with more of a centre (or do I mean a person needing less of a centre) who can flow with life's vicissitudes, despise and deplore them, feel anger and hopelessness, but hold (hold what? something) and come back from them, still able in the midst of it all to see the beauty and the humour and sometimes to connect, not disappear into my own scowling vortex of uncoping. Phew. 'Course, these times when you think you've arrived somewhere, you know that sooner or later you'll spot the real summit still there, far away through the mist.